I'm taking advice from a professional. Sounds a bit serious, but it's a choice, so therefore I guess it's just a good thing, for me.
I often punish myself for the things I don't do with Leila, the activities we don't get around to doing, feeling she's missing out, that I'm a bad mother for not focussing solely on her.
Today I decided I wouldn't feel guilty, I would just slow down and be.
We walked to school and back, meeting friends for a chat along the way. We got home and worked on Leila's Halloween outfit and finished it. We pottered in the garden and then Leila decided we should have a picnic for lunch, which we did.
I haven't made dinner yet and I would normally be clock checking by now, getting myself wound up about all I had to do, but today I'm just choosing not to do so. Dinner will get made, I will get to school in plenty of time, we'll go to swimming lessons and come home and it will all get done.
Apparently I need to exercise more, listen to music and pamper myself, as well as continuing to work on all the above. It's made a small difference in a short amount of time, I'm surely not too old to learn new things, so perhaps there are yet great days ahead.